Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Last week you found out and this week Jessica finds out all about Kentucky. Plus, welcome to episode 23. No stupidity is giving over reacting.
This is always be a big deal podcast.
And now please welcome your host, Clay Phoenix and Jessica Vendetta.
Look girl, all I'm going to say is I am so ready to move to Kentucky and get a bigger house so we can have a studio. You know what I mean?
[00:01:03] Speaker B: Wait, is that going to happen?
[00:01:04] Speaker A: What? When you just said we were in Kentucky?
[00:01:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:01:07] Speaker A: Oh, okay. So I guess I'm letting the cat out of the bag. What? I interviewed for the position and they offered me the position. No.
[00:01:18] Speaker B: You did not tell me that. Did you just get the offer?
[00:01:21] Speaker A: You better lie this week. Yes, I did.
[00:01:25] Speaker B: Wow. Well, I mean, you just left for a moment, so. Okay. Congratulations.
[00:01:30] Speaker A: Thank you.
[00:01:31] Speaker B: When does that, when's that happen?
[00:01:33] Speaker A: So it will happen in early next year.
[00:01:36] Speaker B: Okay. That's crazy. Clay, look at you.
[00:01:40] Speaker A: This is always be a big deal podcast with Clay Phoenix and Jessica Vendetta. I did just yell out of Adam and ask him if he needed some Airpods cause I could hear his videos through the recording.
[00:01:58] Speaker B: That makes sense as to why you come back. So you can't have a big old house and have a studio.
[00:02:04] Speaker A: I love him so much though. Cause he's so innocent, he doesn't realize that he's doing it. And then when I say it, he's like, wait, no, I wasn't like, it wasn't that loud. And I'm like, yeah, sound travels in this house, honey.
[00:02:15] Speaker B: That's funny. Yeah, well, and also. Cause like you're in an apartment.
[00:02:18] Speaker A: Oh, yeah.
[00:02:19] Speaker B: And I don't know what you guys all have in your house, but if you don't have, if you don't have like a lot of stuff on your wall, that, that shit echoes.
[00:02:25] Speaker A: Well, girl, we're gay. We have a lot of stuff on our walls.
[00:02:29] Speaker B: I was actually thinking that. I didn't want to say that.
[00:02:35] Speaker A: I mean, he has this house decorated to the nines. Honey, honestly, you walk into our house, this house is like the model home for the apartments. They show this to show off what their apartments will look like when they are done being decorated.
[00:02:53] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:02:55] Speaker A: Like, it's top notch. This is no joke. He's like designer 101. He's got it down, girl. He's even got the family touch in there. It's just gorge.
[00:03:07] Speaker B: Yeah, I should have known better.
[00:03:10] Speaker A: You should have. That was very offensive.
[00:03:12] Speaker B: I really should have. I mean, I know.
I think I need to give up my gay card for an hour.
[00:03:21] Speaker A: No, you need to give up your fag hag card for about three years for that comment.
[00:03:29] Speaker B: Hey.
[00:03:31] Speaker A: The problem is, is the only spot that we had for the office is that. So there's the kitchen, and then there's a section that's, like, open space, and then it's the living room. So it's almost for, like, a breakfast bar or, like, a breakfast nook.
[00:03:48] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:03:49] Speaker A: Yeah, that's. That's the feel that it gives you in this area.
[00:03:52] Speaker B: So that's why it looks like you're in the kitchen.
[00:03:54] Speaker A: Yes. Yes.
[00:03:55] Speaker B: Because you are. Okay. Because I was actually thinking that I was like, he has to do this in the kitchen, but I didn't see anything. Cause you have an apartment. I get it. Yeah.
[00:04:03] Speaker A: Well, that's our office. We made it our. I mean, it's really cute, like, the way that he set it up for me and stuff.
[00:04:09] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:04:10] Speaker A: It's just now that, like, there's no door to, like, close it off. I feel so bad because when I record, like, they can't watch tv. And, like, he's. He's in our room right now laying in bed, playing on his phone. Like, it's just sad. Like, I want to be able to allow them to still live their lives while I'm doing something that I enjoy doing. So I'm very happy to be able to move and potentially have a bigger house that I could have a room just for a studio so they can still continue to live. And we don't have any eggs thrown at our door anymore.
[00:04:46] Speaker B: And if they are, they better be freaking white egglands.
I don't know if they make brown.
[00:04:52] Speaker A: Egglands, but they better be Eglins best mama.
[00:04:55] Speaker C: Mm hmm.
[00:04:57] Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. That's funny. And can I tell you what an empath you are?
[00:05:02] Speaker A: What?
[00:05:03] Speaker B: You feel bad because David has to lay on his bed for an hour while you record? Do you hear yourself?
[00:05:09] Speaker A: I didn't even notice it. I didn't. I honestly, I didn't even notice it.
[00:05:13] Speaker B: He's fine. Yeah, but he's perfectly fine.
[00:05:17] Speaker A: I know.
[00:05:18] Speaker B: It's not like you record every day for hours.
[00:05:21] Speaker A: Yeah, that's true. That's very true, Zachary.
[00:05:23] Speaker B: And this is something that you love to do, and I love doing it with you, and I know David does not care.
[00:05:29] Speaker A: No, he doesn't care.
[00:05:30] Speaker B: Now, Cassandra might. No, no, but I'm saying, like, he doesn't mind on his bed right now and play on his phone.
[00:05:36] Speaker A: Who? Cassandra? Cassandra better not be coming down here with nothing and trying to be getting into my podcast now, Zachary.
[00:05:42] Speaker B: Wouldn't it be some damn shit, though, if she tomorrow throws Eggle?
Oh, but does she know about the peace order or. Not yet. How's that work?
[00:05:54] Speaker A: She has to be served with it.
[00:05:56] Speaker B: Okay, so she doesn't know about it yet then?
[00:05:58] Speaker A: Probably no.
[00:05:59] Speaker B: All right, well, maybe she knows now. The echo.
[00:06:02] Speaker A: I mean, she probably knows now. She can hear through the floor. She's got like, sonic hearing.
[00:06:07] Speaker B: She probably has like a little cup to the floor right now listening to everything you guys say. Maybe that's what it is.
[00:06:16] Speaker A: That is probably what it is.
[00:06:18] Speaker B: Whenever she hears you and David getting it on, she gets jealous because no one's probably been up in those cobwebs forever, so she gets jealous. That's probably what it is. You're welcome.
[00:06:31] Speaker A: I just saw it's always be a big deal podcast with Clay Phoenix and Jessica Vendetta.
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[00:07:40] Speaker A: This is always be a big deal podcast with Clay Phoenix and Jessica Vendetta.
Go over your trip to New York. How was it?
[00:07:52] Speaker B: Oh, yes, thank you. It was so long ago, I feel like. No, it was really fun. We went, we stayed in New Jersey, took the train into New York. My friend Aaron, like, planned all of it because I didn't. I'm so bad. I think I've said this before, but I'm really bad directions and I mean it. Yes, today I got lost going somewhere that I should have known where to go and I'd use my gps to get back, but that's besides the point. I didn't tell anyone that til just now.
[00:08:18] Speaker A: Yes, the gyps is a lifesaver for me. Do you know how many times.
[00:08:24] Speaker B: Me too. I call it gypsy.
[00:08:28] Speaker A: The gyppus is the new coming of Jesus.
[00:08:30] Speaker B: Yes, yes. For people that are very directionally challenged, such as myself. If I didn't have that, I would probably not drive anywhere. I'm not gonna lie.
[00:08:41] Speaker A: It's almost like the people that are mathematically challenged and they have to have a calculator for everything.
[00:08:46] Speaker B: Yeah, see, I can do percentages and stuff in my head. I can.
[00:08:49] Speaker A: I mean, some people are smarter with other things, but. Anyways, it's back to you, Jessica, on your trip to New York.
[00:08:55] Speaker B: We took the train into New York. We only stayed Saturday to Sunday, and we walked around Times Square, and then my friend saw a sign for tattoos, and she said, we should get tattoos. I was like, okay, because I'm obsessed with tattoos. And so we went, and they didn't open till twelve. It was like eleven something. So we had to wait for them to open. We sat outside the woman's door, and Erin actually ended up messaging her because it was like, 1215. She wasn't there. She was like, I'm in traffic. I'm coming, I'm coming. So she finally comes. We were just about to leave. We're actually walking down the steps. And then she was like, no, no, no, I have to. Because then at that point, we had to be at the show at two. So we had to leave by, like, 130. It was pretty close, but we had to, like, get a cab and all that stuff. And no joke, this woman, she did our tattoos in less than an hour. Two of them. Dang, it was crazy. So I got. I got the golden girls, duh. And Erin got, I think, like a lilac or something. Something on her ankle. No, she was awesome. She. That was a great experience. And then we went to go see little shop of horrors, which was amazing. It had Jinkx Monsoon, who I've never seen before. She was awesome. And Corbin Blue, who I got a picture with, he was very, very, very kind. Like, I cannot believe. They come out after the show, take pictures for free. That was crazy to me.
[00:10:16] Speaker A: For free?
[00:10:17] Speaker B: For free. I mean, I paid for the ticket. Don't you think that's crazy?
[00:10:21] Speaker A: That is insane. That is insanity. Something is free in New York. What? A picture for free with a big name artist like Jinx Monsoon or Corbin Blue. For free.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: I know. Yes. Like, I could put a picture up right now of me and him and pretend he was my boyfriend.
I wouldn't do that. Cause I did like him in high school musical.
[00:10:41] Speaker A: But, Zachary, nobody would believe that Corbin Blue was your boyfriend. Bitch. Come on.
[00:10:46] Speaker B: Yes, they would.
[00:10:47] Speaker A: No, they would not.
[00:10:48] Speaker B: Okay, anytime I show anyone the picture, they say, who's that? So I can totally. I'm just making my profile picture.
[00:10:54] Speaker A: Girl, calm down.
[00:10:55] Speaker B: Just don't tell Derek.
No, I honestly don't want any of my boyfriend. I'm just kidding. I mean, if I'm going to pick anyone, I'm going to Photoshop in Eminem. I'm just saying. Eminem, if you ever listen, I really do love you.
[00:11:08] Speaker A: Really?
That's where we just went with that. You think Eminem listens to this podcast? First of all, this little janky ass podcast that has 110 listeners, and we feel like we're famous because of that. You think that Eminem stops and takes time out of his day to listen to always be a big deal?
[00:11:31] Speaker B: I just.
Oh, my God.
Yes. Because let me tell you why. He is releasing an album on May 31. What? May 31 is what?
[00:11:43] Speaker A: Zachary.
[00:11:43] Speaker B: Yeah. See, you're not a good friend.
[00:11:45] Speaker A: Your birthday.
[00:11:46] Speaker B: Thank you.
[00:11:46] Speaker A: I know what it is.
[00:11:48] Speaker B: That was a good guess.
[00:11:49] Speaker A: I know what it is. But you can't say that that's him listening to the podcast because we've never said what your birthday was until that very moment.
[00:11:59] Speaker B: I'm pretty sure I've told everyone I'm a Gemini about 55 times, so I'm sure that they've looked at my profile to see my birthday because they want to buy me a present. Duh.
[00:12:07] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. They're totally going to baby reindeer you now, girl.
[00:12:11] Speaker B: Oh, yes. Can't wait. Make sure you talk. I shouldn't say that. I shouldn't say that. But if you do, can you talk in an accent? Thank you.
[00:12:23] Speaker A: All I ask if you baby reindeer me is talking an accent.
Yeah, I mean, anyways, finish up and finish up, New York, bitch.
[00:12:33] Speaker B: Okay. And then that was it. That was our trip, and we came home.
[00:12:36] Speaker A: Oh, damn.
[00:12:37] Speaker B: That was seriously it.
[00:12:38] Speaker A: The biggest. The best part about that trip, though, is the fact that you guys just saw a tattoo shop and decided to get tattoos together.
[00:12:46] Speaker B: It was.
[00:12:47] Speaker A: That is such a Jessa and Ducky thing to do. Ducky is now gonna be our friend's nickname.
[00:12:53] Speaker B: Okay, I'll tell her. I already said her name, her mask.
[00:12:57] Speaker A: You know, her identity secret.
[00:12:59] Speaker B: Oh, okay.
[00:13:00] Speaker A: It's okay. I'm gonna bleep it out with Ducky. You're gonna be talking, and you're. And you're just gonna be like, da da da da duckie. Da da da da da da duckie. Da da da da da.
[00:13:09] Speaker B: Do you want. Here, I'll. Do you want me to say it? Oh, no, that would be too much work. So do you want me to. Do you want me to say it so you can dub it? I mean, you're gonna be up all night, Ducky. There you go. In case you want to.
[00:13:24] Speaker A: Perfect. That's perfect. Now I can fill it in on every spot.
[00:13:30] Speaker B: Yeah, which is funny because we actually call each other SpongeBob and Patrick. Me and her.
[00:13:36] Speaker A: It's always be a big deal. Podcasts with Clay Phoenix and Jessica Vendetta.
Is this giving? Overreacting? Am I overreacting about my wife experimenting? My wife went to lunch the other day with my brother's wife and my sister. They apparently had a lot of drink, so they call my brother and I for rides and vehicle retrieval.
Smart, smart ladies. My brother and I pick them up and he drives his wife's car back. But the three women head over to my sister's apartment. I return to my home and my brother to his. I found out later, when my wife acted a tad strange about what they did at the apartment, that they experimented together. I had assumed they were going to drink more at my sister's apartment or possibly smoke. I've never been cheated on, but this doesn't feel to me as if it was cheating. However, it feels a bit weird. One, obviously that my sister was involved. Two, that I found out kind of by accident. Not sure if my wife planned to tell me. Not sure if my wife planned to tell me. It feels maybe on the fence of a small betrayal. I don't know. Thoughts? Opinions? Perhaps I could add. I wonder, should I ask my brother if he is aware of what went down? I asked my wife about it. She says she doesnt remember much, but they were naked in the bed. Not that it is my concern, but she said she did not climax and is unsure if the other two did. My concern is more the betrayal of being unsure if she ever would have told me if I had not found out. Also, I will see my brother on Friday and see how he feels about it, as I feel like he has a right to know. I suppose I can agree with what most people say. Yes, I was cheated on. However, how I feel about it, whether there was malice, if I divorce and stop talking to my sister, is my decision. A few people mention potential SA concerns. All three were intoxicated. All seemed to be slurring and unsteady on their feet. Other than that, I dont know. Perhaps itll be worth asking my wife if she has any concerns or feelings on that. That's a lot to unpack.
[00:15:49] Speaker B: I wish you could see my face right now.
[00:15:55] Speaker A: I wish you could see mine.
[00:15:57] Speaker B: I'm sorry, but that is so weird. I mean, I'm not saying you should get a divorce but that is her sister in law. If she had a penis, it would be a problem.
[00:16:11] Speaker A: I think it's just because it was women on women. I mean, it's a very sexist way to look at it.
[00:16:17] Speaker B: Oh, and they didn't climax, clay, so it's fine.
[00:16:21] Speaker A: No, it's not fine.
[00:16:23] Speaker B: No, I know. Saying, like, that's what he kind of said, though.
[00:16:27] Speaker A: I know that's what he said. I'm just trying to, like, save men right now. I have to be Jesus of men. Let me save you, brother. Let me save you from this public shame.
[00:16:37] Speaker B: Okay, well, I'm gonna have to speak for the women, because I am one sometimes.
[00:16:44] Speaker A: Okay. So I'm gonna.
[00:16:46] Speaker B: And. Okay, that's fine.
[00:16:47] Speaker A: I'm gonna speak for the man. He's stupid.
[00:16:51] Speaker B: Was the white, I wouldn't have done it. So there's that. And if you. I mean, live your life how you want, but, like, are you an open marriage? Because I'd be concerned that if she drinks, that's what she does now, and you just happen to find out about this. Like, that is a no.
[00:17:10] Speaker A: Yep.
[00:17:10] Speaker B: So, yeah, again, live your life how you want, but that.
[00:17:14] Speaker A: I mean, I can agree with you. I was literally going to say that.
[00:17:16] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, that's nuts. But you know what? Hearing things like that makes me feel so normal. Look how normal we are, Clay.
[00:17:23] Speaker A: I think he has a very man outlook on it. I think that if it was. If it was him and his brother in law and they had done something together, the wife would have reacted a lot differently than he did to the wife doing it. Because that's the common thought process in people's heads now, is that lesbianism is perfectly normal, and having two guys having sex is the end of the world.
[00:17:48] Speaker B: Yes. When you're supposed to be straight, quote unquote. Yes, it's true.
[00:17:52] Speaker A: Yeah. So I think it would have had a different. A different approach and a different impact. But I also think that, as men, we need to stop thinking that that is the norm and just see the facts for what the facts are. Your wife was drunk, which is not an excuse. Cause if that was a man, that would have been cheating. It is somebody outside of your relationship. So therefore, it. By definition, it is cheating.
[00:18:16] Speaker B: And I feel like he's definitely brushing this off because it was women on women. But it's still, regardless of how you look at it, it's cheating. And if you decide in your marriage you're okay with the cheating, that's fine. But just know that if this is how she acts when she's intoxicated and this is the first time she ever been intoxicated. Then I feel like you have bigger issues.
[00:18:38] Speaker A: Am I overreacting by breaking up with my girlfriend after she went camping with two other men? My girlfriend and I have been together for two years. When we first met, before we got into a relationship, told me she wanted to move out of state. Her reasons were very valid. However, I wasn't looking to move yet since I have obligations to tend to for at least a couple more years. The first year and a half were great. We had our ups and downs, we went through a lot together, but boy did we form a bond as a resort. Now we have been long distance for half a year and boy is it hard. Not gonna lie, it's taken quite a toll on me. However, I love this woman. I've seen her three times the past past half a year. Each time for three to four days. I'm putting my ducks in a row in order to move there in about a year. She lives there now and of course she has to make friends, et cetera. She made some friends playing volleyball at the park. There's this one particular guy named Mike who wants to be her mentor for the job. She does. He's legit. However, when I first met him, he was almost called off guard that she had a boyfriend. Something about how he said, oh, cool. When she introduced us, I dont know. Their interaction together was weird. I never want to be that kind of boyfriend. So I shelved it in my mind and moved on. Now she told me that shes going camping with some volleyball people. Two guys and her one, and one of them is Mike. She could see it on my face that I was uncomfortable with it. But we got distracted with something else and didnt talk about it. She came back a few days later and told me she convinced one of her girlfriends to come with her so each could sleep in their respective cars. It's not about the camp. I'm just not liking this mic guy. I can tell her that, but I can't tell her what to do or what not to do. They're back from camp now. I don't know. I feel like she probably wouldn't like it if I did that with two other women.
[00:20:47] Speaker B: Okay, were they in the same tent or did you say they slept in their cars?
[00:20:52] Speaker A: The guys paid for everything.
It looks like they all of the group did all the things together. Like jet skis, paddle boards, boats. They spent the whole day together on a boat. He paid for everything. I guess that's the part that bothers him is that it was almost like a double date.
[00:21:10] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:21:11] Speaker A: With two guys and two girls, which makes complete sense.
[00:21:14] Speaker B: Plus the long distance thing, like, that's a rough one, though.
[00:21:19] Speaker A: Yeah, it's a really tough situation.
[00:21:21] Speaker B: Doing long distance is hard. Anyways, I may have never done it, but I can imagine, so I couldn't do it. But this is just my opinion. Trust your gut.
[00:21:33] Speaker A: Oh, yeah. Always trust your gut. Your gut is never going to lie.
[00:21:37] Speaker B: And normally you're not always, but normally your feelings are right. I hate to say that to that.
[00:21:42] Speaker A: Poor guy, but, yes, whatever you're feeling is definitely valid. So definitely listen to that. Listen to the universe. Listen to the feeling in your gut. Listen to everything that's around you because it's definitely telling you something. But at the end of the day, it's your decision. Don't let anybody else make a decision for you. It is your decision, and you do not need to get anybody's opinion on Reddit. It is your decision.
[00:22:04] Speaker B: Absolutely. I agree with that. That's rough. Like, I don't think I'd be okay with that.
[00:22:09] Speaker A: I don't think I would be okay with it either.
[00:22:10] Speaker B: Yeah. Like, I try. Like, I do try to be trusting with the right person until they give me a reason not to, but that if you're going with, like, a bunch of people, maybe, but that sounds like a double date.
[00:22:27] Speaker A: The fact that he wasn't invited as the part that kind of bothers me that that's your boyfriend and you didn't invite him, at least give him the opportunity to say, no, I can't go.
[00:22:38] Speaker B: That's true.
[00:22:39] Speaker A: You didn't do that. So therefore, that becomes shady boots. Like, that would make me think, like, what are you doing, girl? You didn't invite me to go. This is with a mic guy that you clearly have something for because you're giggly and flirting and, like, to me.
[00:22:54] Speaker B: Like, just break up with the guy.
[00:22:57] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:22:58] Speaker B: And I don't know if, like, some people think. I think, like, it's more fun, unfortunately. Like, to have the side piece. It's more exciting. You know what I mean? Because then once you get in a relationship, like, all the real things come up.
[00:23:12] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:23:13] Speaker B: So it could be, you know, because women are just as guilty of that as, you know, just like men. So it could be, like, that situation. But, yeah, I don't know.
[00:23:22] Speaker A: It's a human construct.
[00:23:24] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:23:28] Speaker A: Thank you for listening to always be a big deal podcast. You can follow us, rate, review, and subscribe anywhere that you listen to your podcast. Follow us on Facebook ww dot facebook.com alwaysbeabigdeal. You can also follow us on all of our other socials. Always underscore podcast odd. So until next time, always be a big deal.
